Wake up so early every morning.
Why l never get rich?
What are you doing?
Whenever l am in the shower you always come in for the toilet.
ls today Sunday?
No, you hope for Sunday all the time.
lf you didn't sell the car.
We don't have to take the bus now.
My car stereo was stolen eight times within a month.
My tire was stolen for seven times.
l had to find a parking space for so many hours.
l had to pay the parking fee until twelve midnight.
lt takes thirty dollars for a hour parking.
- Can you afford it? - l can't
But l am sweating. Me too.
The bus is coming...
Driver, someone is still trying to get into the bus.
Driver, porky driver...
He aimed so accurate, l can't win a lottery like him.
Fatty, do you have any moral?
Morning...
Sorry.
- Congratulation. - Thanks...
- lt's all up to you. - Congratulation...
We all agree during the meeting.
You are the man to deal our business in the mainland.
About the 1881 Hair Growing Water agency right.
That is a very undeveloped place.
Actually it is not that far away.
First you take the train, then ride a seven hours bus trip.
Then ride a donkey for half a day journey.
Climb over the mountain, you will arrive the place.
This is my acting's style, how's it?
Looks like a Juan Yuan, very stylistic.
Then you should come for my show.
Next week, l'll perform at my schools's hall.
l had made a reservation for ten $500 ticket for you.
You mean five thousand dollars all together.
What a lousy day l am having.
lt's not bad enough.
Why? Brother Chi.
Brother Chiu, don't force me too much chasing the debt over here.
- Beat him! - Wait
l am scared of the blood let's go away from the Scene.
l...Brother Chiu...
He must owed those guys lots of the gambling money.
They come to beat him up, good for him.
How you look so ugly?
Are you hurt?
Of course, nonsense.
Sorry l can't help you.
Help, you will be beaten up if you help.
Do you need a doctor?
l realize a theory.
What theory?
- l must get rich. - Nonsense.
What nonsense, This time l go to the mainland.
l decide to smuggle.
What kind of road this is, l almost get killed.
Be patient.
Sitting with these, l almost get killed.
Thirsty, let's drink something.
Get away from me.
Are we arrived?
This road like the old route to get the Buddish Books.
Looks like it.
So cold, didn't have a bath for eight days.
l am so hungry!
l had all my clothes on, l am still feeling cold.
We all lived like this, call me if you need anything.
l didn't know what he is talking about.
Except this line.
- What did he say? - He said this is the president's suite.
Nuts, president's jail looks better that here.
Think something to smuggle out.
No, it is illegal.
l don't care about it, let's get contact first.
Nuts, there is no telephone here.
Nothing, how to contact them?
They borrow a first class communication system for me.
How are they so advance?
Straight confidential, this is the trading map.
- Does it work? - Of course.
Coming here at night is very dangerous.
Nothing is more dangerous than poor.
Commardae, where are you?
l am here.
Where are they?
- Are you Mr. Chi? - Yes, where is the goods?
Good stuff, we are rich.
This is Had Dynasty's horse, China's national treasure.
- Looks like a real one. - Yes.
We are selling for real stuff, no fake goods here.
What? l am looking for fake stuff.
l tried to cheat the Hong Kong people.
They are all real.
lf these are real, they are all national's treasure.
Can't take it, will get executed.
You don't say, l don't, who knows.
We all know.
Don't run, l am going to shoot at you, stand over there.
Don't shoot!
- No more sound. - Good boy!
They don't shoot, they just fire the cannon, run, quick.
Mr. Chi, you go first, let me cover you.
So sorry.
Then l go first, you cover for me.
Go and catch those two with guns on hand.
Gun, you were mistaken.
That snake bites me.
No problem, l helped you to suck the poison out.
You are such a unusual friend.
Thank you.
l was bite by the snake too.
Now is the turn you suck the poisoned blood out.
You want me to suck it out.
Suck which part.
Here.
Up to this stage, you should sacrifice.
- You told me to die, are you kidding? - No kidding.
l always let you eat the bigger portion.
l let you had the ham of my sandwich, let you have the toilet first.
l suck the poisoned blood out for you.
Now you should do it too.
You asked me to do this disgusting thing.
What shall l do then?
- You want to kill me. - Be cool!
Have you seen stalone helped himself out?
- Lie down. - Am l dying?
How do l know, lie down, quick.
That Stalone is a idiot, have the fire burn off my ass.
Don't run, l don't recognized the road.
Ah Chi, wait for me, Ah Chi.
l am going to kill that Stalone.
l am so scared.
Brother, why don't you yell when you felt down.
My mouth is full of water, how can l yell?
Figure something out to get out of here.
There is something over there.
Be careful, don't move.
Money granted for you.
l am rich, that's me.
Pick up those gold.
lt's you who touch the trick.
Did you see it writes you are in trouble.
There is no way out.
What a big gold, everyone will want to have it.
Go and find the way out.
There are some words on that wall.
Only way out, against the water flow.
We had to be in the water.
Be careful.
Why it is so heavy?
- Something is stick on me. - What?
Just a rattan, what to be scared.
Snake, snake...
Quick, climb up.
What? What?
Your ass is so attractive, even a snake like to bite.
Don't be too happy about it.
What? ls this the exit?
Doesn't like an exit, feels very horrible.
Look, Drop the coin, Bright up the future.
ls it real?
Who cares, l don't have a coin.
You are right, how about this one?
- Do you want to try it? - You try it.
- What do you think? - Look.
- What is it there? - l don't know.
- So pretty. - Looks so ugly,
and you said it is pretty.
Do you think we can get out of here?
lt's up to the fate.
The master of the decade Lung Chin Fi was buried here.
- The name is very familiar. - lt's him.
He looks like my father.
No kidding.
What is this?
When you are angry, will your face change the color?
No.
Tell me frankly, are you very angry now?
- No. - You are very weird now.
You are so bored.
Look at your face, it is so dark in color.
Nuts, why is it so dark?
Not only your hand is dark, look.
Who is he? Who is he?
lt is yourself.
Do you know you look like a god now?
You mean l like a Black face God.
No, like Michael Jackson.
There is color people because his ancestors was poisoned.
That snake must be a poisoned one.
What shall we do now?
Right, most of the masters have the anti-poison powder on hand.
Look, this was found near master Lung's dead body.
This might be it.
Take it out.
Two books here, Seven Cut and the Ru Lai Shen Chiuan Hand.
- What else? - What is this?
l don't know.
lt must be this, ease off the poison and strengthen your power.
- You are saved. - You are in good luck.
Why? You are so happy when you saw the medicine.
This is the pill for the god to swallow.
Right, take it, it will save your life.
Come, eat it.
Are we good brothers?
Of course, take it.
- Half and half. - No way.
lf you said l swallowed the shit, you will laugh at me forever.
No, that is no brother's behavior.
Are you nuts? Bites me.
l can spread some of the poison for you.
Your must eat half of it.
You have the bigger part.
l never did anything bad in my whole life.
The only mistake l made is to be your friend.
lt really works.
Really?
Getting lighter color, recovered so fast.
l am fine now, we are rich.
How can you jump so high? My goodness.
May be l had the magic power now, let me read that book.
This girl looks prettier then Miss Hong Kong.
Go, why are you so impatient?
You don't afraid her face was poisoned.
- What? - Have you seen?
- What? - She is moving her eyes up.
No kidding.
Hsiu Mun, what do you want?
Princess, l think it is for a while already.
- Did you save me? - No.
Yes, yes, we saved you.
Why both of you dressed so weird?
You didn't wear different.
Listen your tone, comes from the middle part of the China.
Right, they are the same as us, from the south.
Talking in Middle's accent.
Princess, let's talk like them too.
Sure.
Tien Chian is still around, let's go.
Where are you going?
Before Tien awake, let's get away this place.
Otherwise it will be too late.
What to be afraid of, we two can take care of him.
Don't look down at him, he is the best of the evil side.
He is very good in martial arts.
Princess, take them away, let me slow him down.
Hsiu Mun, be careful.
- Let's find the exit first. - Don't move.
lt is moving, used your hand to open it up.
Did you eat the pill?
l did.
Let's watch page two, l'll teach you the martial arts
- What is this? - According to this book.
Use your energy from the upper stomach to laugh, try it.
Laugh, harder.
Right, hand out.
- What? - Useless.
You are too silly, come, try harder.
According to the book, laugh harder.
Laugh, more.
Right, keep it on.
Right, spend all your energy to laugh.
Ready, hands out.
Success.
- Hsiu Mun... - Princess, what's wrong?
Come, what are you doing? Come closer.
Why? Am l look so terrible?
Tien Chian awake, let's go now.
l'll bring you to Hong Kong, he can't find you.
Hong Kong.
- Then let's go. - Go...
Over here.
Princess Yun Lo, l'll find you wherever you go?
Sir your lamp is so different.
Now they changed the name, it is called Electric lighter.
Blow it off, try it.
What is the year now?
- Nineties. - Try some.
Princess, look at the furniture, and the bath tub.
The same as us.
- No, it is used for the bowel- - Bowels movement.
Right, what year of Chi Yuan now?
What year of Chi Yuan?
A few hundred years.
We had been sleeping for a few hundred years already.
Yes, a few hundred years.
Tien Chian catch me to the cemetery.
Forced me to swallow the thousand years Jen Hsin.
lt can have eight hundred years more life time, but...
l don't care about any possibility.
l don't care about who Tien Chian is.
l just want to know who are you?
My name is Hsiu Mun.
She is the most pretty girl in the world Princess Yun Lo.
Why don't you two kneeled down?
l am Prince Charles.
l am Prince Charles B.
Charles B?
This is my servant, Hsiu Mun from the south.
Mun Clan, how can she speak Mandarin.
Let me tell you, when it is in the Yuan Dynasty.
We all speak Mandarin.
- Then l was the same as yours too. - Right?
Tien Chian is the best of the evil side.
Tien Chian is very powerful.
He got the thousand years old Jen Hsin to eat.
He had lived for over a thousand years already.
He went to the master Lung's grave, try to the book.
l tried to stop him, was caught by him.
Shao Lin's four monks were here too.
They fought against Tien Chian, were killed by him.
But Tien Chian was freezed by their power too.
Before he was pass out.
He surrounded us.
l didn't realize it was passed for a thousand years already.
You two are the Yuan dynasty's people, that's an antique.
l'll revenge for myself to against Tien Chian.
He will come for us, let's escape.
No problem, we can bring you to Hong Kong.
You will win as Miss Hong Kong.
Do l get the gold or silver for winning?
You are over aged already.
Even you are young enough can't win it too.
They don't have the l.D. card, can't get through the custom department.
Are you out of your mind?
Anyway it is smuggling, who needs the l.D. card.
Look over this iron curtain, there is Hong Kong.
Wait a few moment, those soldiers take a lift.
We can climb over there.
Even you meet the tiger, be careful of yourself.
l can jump over it.
Fat girl, don't fool me.
Even the high Jump winner can't jump over it.
Sorry, she is just kidding.
Miss, don't be scare, l'll take care of you.
You dare tried to touch my Princess.
Enough, Hsiu Mun, that's it.
Stop, don't run, stop.
l didn't realize the western weapon is so powerful.
Comrade, l knew my ideology was wrong.
l'll criticize myself, please release.
- Go to hell. - Hsiu Mun, go faster.
Go away, quick.
Come out, say it, who are they?
They are the People's Movement actives.
l can't believe these people escape try to every other methods.
People's Movement is so powerful.
Shall we inform the special squad to catch them.
Don't be nonsense, l'll report to the officers.
Can anyone jump over this iron fence, you are exaggerate.
l'll transfer you to the north for re-education.
Pretend nothing has been happened.
Yes, nothing has been happened.
Up, send you to the North for re-education.
Please forgive me.
ls this Hong Kong?
l heard here is Kowloon.
Sir, this is the size of the room?
Take it, let me tell you, Hong Kong's land is very expensive.
Just face it.
- How can you hit him? - Sir.
Just called me brother Fi.
You are going to keep us, l am so impressed.
How can l ask anymore?
Hsiu Mun
What Fi said is what l am saying.
- You should listen to me. - Yes, Princess.
- Understand? - Master Wu
if you need anything Hsiu Mun to do it.
Just tell me.
Are you finished with these two wierdo?
Look at that dirty thief wears so sexy.
princess, give the order.
We should executed them.
Sit down, don't shout.
Forget about them, about time to work.
Ask them read the instruction manual.
These are either English or ltalian.
Do you think they understand it?
They should know how to read the map.
Nuts.
What a dirty girl...
Punish them.
Don't touch those books, l am going to work.
Wait until l am off, l'll teach you use these.
These are all with electricity.
Electricity, understand?
Master, let us study it by ourselves.
May be l can work it out.
Master, you don't know it.
Our Princess is the best in emberdories.
She can cook very well too.
She is the best.
Wash the clothes.
Master, why are your clothes.
Smells stink.
Don't bull shit, go.
Before l come back, don't touch it.
Understand?
l forget to ask them where is the river around?
How can l wash the clothier?
Can you eat?
Are you not enough to have the boss yelling?
Even l don't take it, others will.
She doesn't know how to cook, she might have a gas leak.
Too much gas, don't touch the ring bell.
lt will blow up.
princess, they are back.
Don't let them in.
Yes.
Go...go out, go out...
You can't come in yet.
No matter what happen, let me see.
My princess said you can't.
Princess said what l said she will do.
You are right.
- What? - Closed the door.
- Yes. - Take care.
Air-condition, television are on.
- Taste so great. - Not bad.
These food are cooked by the princess for you to eat.
Can she used the kitchen to cook?
Princess is coming.
lssey Miyaki, where did you get it?
No, l tailored as it is on the book.
- Do you have any textiles? - Used your curtain textiles.
No wonder it looks familiar.
l did for myself too, but l won't let you see now.
Tell me frankly, are you the real ancient people?
You read the magazine, you can use the electricity.
Are you cheating me?
No, you said it is an ltalian book.
l can read it.
Bull shit, you should say Kahn is your father too.
Right, he is my great grand father.
l can read this foreigners' book.
Because Marco Polo had been in the town.
He taught us.
- Marco Polo? - Marco Polo is your teacher?
Those noodles inside your refrigerator.
Those were the noodles l taught Marco Polo brought it back to ltaly.
What, the spagatti was coming from China, impossible.
Those pancake, l taught him too.
Pizza, was Chines pancake.
Sung Dynasty had a guy named Wu Sung, his brother is Wu Da Lang.
He specialized in selling this type of cake.
He said Wu Da Lang selling the pizza, can you believe her?
Of course.
Wu Da Lang is so poor, he had to sell his wife to Sze Mun Chin.
How Can l eat all these?
The emperor used to eat more than hundred dishes.
What is this called?
You are eating crispy duck.
So sweet, what is this?
Sweet cake, made by seven different fruits.
l made it.
How about this?
Fei's soap.
Why is it on the table?
l forget to get it back after l used it.
To know you is my misfortune.
- Are you alright. - Master Chi, water is coming.
Master Chi.
Let me changed the cloth l tailored for myself for you to see.
Let me take a shower first, or else my eyes will be infected.
Where is my underwear?
Master, is Hsiu Mun pretty?
You...
How about my new underwear?
You even used my family's treasure.
This underwear was given by my Honey.
l had to wear this whenever l meet her.
Give it back to me.
You can't touch me.
You saw my body already.
How can l face others from now on?
You better not to see other people.
Princess, you must take care Hsiu Mun.
Did you see her belly?
l never saw such dirty belly.
Master, Hsio Mun was in the palace since She is eleven.
She is like my sister too.
She is definitely a virgin.
Look, her hand still had a virgin mark.
lf you touch her.
l will have her married you.
You want me to married her just because l saw her belly.
lf l were on the beach, l can pick so many girls then.
You mean you don't want to marry her.
- Of course. - Hsiu Mun
Kill yourself in front of him.
Suicide, great.
No, don't, stop her.
lt won't be that serious.
Master, you don' t know, for the girls of Yuan dynasty.
Virginity is very important.
You saw her belly, if you don't marry her.
She had to die without any choice.
That's impossible, there must be other alternate way.
Yes, but you won't choose it.
What l won't take it? l'll.
That's kill you.
l'll kill you, kill you.
You had seen my belly, l am going to kill you.
Don't run, you dare to run away...
Don't ace foolishly.
Actually Hsiu Mun is not a bad girl.
What do you mean?
Think of it, she is still a virgin.
Where can you find a virgin these days?
Just like to panda, a very rare animal.
You must be kidding.
Just think too much, understand.
For the ancient people, you can marry more than one wife.
Just married her, treat here like you servant.
Even you go out for another girl.
She won't dare to say a word.
- l won't loss anything. - Really.
Come here.
Aren't you say you don't want to marry me?
- lf you want me to marry you. - Really?
Buy you had to listen to me forever.
You did what l tell you to do so.
Yes, whatever my husband's order l will follow.
lf you don't perform as a good wife, l'll fire you.
Help my back.
No, l didn't marry you yet, l can't see you.
Let's do it simple, report right the way.
No, at least l need a face handkerchief.
Face handkerchief.
Finished, massage my back.
- My leg first. - lt works.
Master, if you didn't help us.
We will be inside the grave forever.
Since we have fate to meet each other, and you had swallowed the pills.
You had fifty years martial arts power.
l can teach you the martial arts according to that book.
ln case no one will ever perform it.
The Magic Hand had nine acts.
lf you can play the first eight acts, you can go anywhere.
About the last act.
That is the most power act in the world.
lt was used only three times as l had been told.
The first time is the Buddha beat over the Evil.
The second time is the Fire God win over Three Power Hands.
The last time is Long Chin Fi win over the Tien Chian.
Did you hear what l say?
Of course l am listening.
Do you want to learn?
This magic power includes different type of acts.
To protect your body too.
After you learned it, it means you had learned everything.
So it needs a good body to learn it.
How about me?
You are too stupid, your body is not fit enough.
You can only learn the Seven Hands Cut.
But l used that act inside the mountain hole.
You just work it out by luck.
Hsiu Mun, do as the book said.
Teach your husband over there.
Go.
How are we going to practice?
l teach you the first act, Buddha flying to the west.
Tongue's up, concentrate, breathe, look at your nose.
Concentrate your breathing.
Now you had got the first act already.
Now start to breath through your body.
You can feel like in the sky.
Jump.
lt won't hurt.
So high.
Am l really had to jump?
Just like a dragon in the sky.
Don't force me, l don't want to jump.
l had made up my mind, l am not going to jump.
- Master. - What?
Look at my eyes.
Look at me, what do you see?
Do you know what do l want?
What do you want?
l want...push you down.
Buhdda Flying to the West.
l am success.
What? Are you alright?
l am fine.
You used the same technique fly up here.
Find...very dangerous, you go in first, right...
Are you out of your mind, l can take the elevator instead of flying.
How did you practice last night?
l have learned the first eight acts.
l am better than you, l learned the Seven Cut already.
Since we are so good, why should we go to work anymore?
You think you can go to rob the bank.
You should down to the earth.
At least work after this month.
Taxi.
l think we have to take the bus.
- Where is my grandson - Open the door.
Please stop the bus.
Buhdda Flying West.
go, go, go...
Did l see it wrong, that guy can run faster than the bus.
Everyone is faster than the bus when you are in the traffic jam.
Don't cry.
Thank you, sir, my grandson.
Nuts, do you want to die?
- l think you want to get kill. - You say me.
Not you, him.
Anyway, l think you mean me.
l will cancel your driving license with your crazy driving.
Please, don't cancel my license.
This is none of my business, don't trick me.
No one will complain with your look.
Officer, give me another chance.
Don' t talk, get your license out.
Ah chi, where is your gambling debt?
Brother Chiu, you are here, don't hurt me, l am so afraid.
You mean you don't have any money.
l won't give you even l have money.
Every time you hurts me so heavy.
Of course, because you change tricks every time.
Otherwise it is not excited.
Ah Fi, l'll go to the exit with them.
l won't get you involved since we are pals.
Let them beat me enough, go.
Please have a cup of tea.
l am always in fair condition.
From now, you hit me one, l'll hit you one.
Can l not to fight?
No way.
You don't have to pay me the money.
l don't want to pay, but l want to fight.
- You are really in fight. - You said we have to fight.
You don't understand the ironic.
The Chinese with status's speech means nothing.
l'll boat you up to clear up your mind.
Help
l'll cut.
- Are you Mr. Chi? - Yes
l am Kao Li Chiu's brother Kao Li Pa.
l'll revenge because you beat up my brother.
lf you have gut, come to meet me in Hung Ham.
You better be there if you are a man
Good, l'll give you a good lesson this time.
Kao Li Chi, Kao Li Pa, l am here.
You dare to fight against me, come and try your best
How many people did you bring along?
You better all come out.
Better than l had to find each of you.
What's the big deal, owing some money, you had to flush the shit.
lt's him who use the magic tricks t us
What are you doing?
Used the black dog's blood and urine will solve your trick.
You dare to pour that on me, l am going to kill you.
lt doesn't work anymore, now is my turn to kill you.
Brothers, kill this guy.
You are too much, ask so many people come.
Trust me, over there.
Where is my husband?
My dear wife, help.
Husband, shit on your body.
Who dare to do it on my husband?
Me
Go, quick, go.
The Buhdda appeared.
The Buhdda smiles.
The Buhdda Starts.
The Buhdda is angry.
You better leave.
Your technique is better than mine.
You are the best in the world.
No, Tien Chian is better than him.
You are so dumb, Tien Chian is in the mainland.
Brother, stop.
What can l do for you?
- Take it off. - Nonsense
You are looking to get kill.
Comrade, you are too heavy on him.
None of your business, l just teach him a lesson.
He is in good luck l didn't kill him.
Both of you learn the same technique.
But comrade's technique is kind of over.
Doesn't look like a special technique person.
Who are you?
l am Yin Chin.
Old guy, you looks very hard working.
l think you are very hard working too, sweats all over you back.
Old guy, l think you can't stand any longer.
You can't either, young guy.
Don't try too hard, O.K.
Fine, let's leave it, 1,2,3.
Fine, our power are the same.
But l still have a special technique of Tien Chian Foot.
l want to fight against you.
Master Yin, hit him.
Master Yin, give him a lesson.
l can't stand up at all.
You better watch yourself.
We study the Buhdda, working the goodness.
We don't like to fight.
What ever you like, go ahead.
Good, you don't fight with me, l am the boss in the area.
You guys call me ''Big Brother'' from now on.
Sure, whatever you say.
Biggie...
Where is the production fee?
Last night you didn't go home, Hsiu Mun yells the whole night.
l can't get rich.
So l went to Macau to gamble.
You went to Macau.
l am famous in Macau.
Last night l won twenty straight bit.
You are rich, you can leave then.
But l lost more than twenty shots today.
That is the ending as usual.
Don't tell others, please.
How about those production fees?
Ask them help without pay.
You tell them.
Look, see the guy who can convince others how to talk.
- Are you ready, stuntman? - No problem.
- How is the wire? - Fine.
How is the camera?
Everyone is ready, camera, action.
Why did they act on the scene?
Otherwise what can they do?
Looks like real, is it?
Cut, come over here to collect the wire.
Pretend you are picking up the wire, understand?
Pick the wire.
Quick, come help chi to cut off the wire.
There is no wire here.
- No wire. - There is no wire here.
What is this? Did you see it clear?
- Cut it off. - Where?
Come, good, that is it, take it.
What are you looking? Go.
Passed? Passed.
Master Hamburger, fourth shot, take one.
As the Master, we spend a lot of energy.
After practice, l always eat The Master Hamburger.
Dear friends, have a Master Hamburger.
Study in good spirit, won't be afraid of examination.
Master have to eat the Hamburger too.
l am passed too.
Finished, very clever
Master like to eat hamburger, made of pure beef.
People in Hong Kong is in luck, to eat the real stuff.
Master like...shit, l can't remember the line.
Can l have another chance.
Alright, l'll give you another chance.
They are the secret clan, to read the special code.
Hong Kong people are in good luck, to have the good stuff to eat.
You knew it.
- Thanks, brother. - Your turn.
Master like to eat hamburger.
Master like to eat the back stuff, crazy beef full of hair.
Hong Kong people is in luck, had to wash after eating.
Only the last act can beat Tien Chian.
lf you can't understand the Fullhouse Buhdda.
No one can beat him.
lmpossible, that is in your period.
We are different, we have many weapons.
We have bullets, cannons, atomic bombs, unclear bombs.
Even the best technique won't help.
- You mean the western weapons. - Right.
lf he had a Tien Chian Gloves with do.
Where to buy? At Seven Eleven.
Really, are you kidding?
- Did my faster call? - No.
Don't tell him l am here. e is asking me for money.
Who cares?
Even if he asked, it is reasonable.
My father needs the money to gamble, drink, fight and ask for the girls.
l only learned a little bit from him.
Then he is not a human being.
He is not a human bring, he is a writer.
Lions head with snake body, how's it?
Why is his hand inside your pocket?
He stole three thousand dollars during taking the picture.
Only Master eat the hamburger, you are not the master.
Eat the banana.
What's up?
Tien Chian is very powerful, be careful.
He is Tien Chian.
Kid, you even have learned the Ru Lai Shen Chiuan.
You better leave, or l...
What do you want?
Don't try to call the police.
l almost say that.
No.
Princess Yun Lo, l loved you over seven hundred years.
Don't you even get move.
Tien Chian, forget about it.
You better drop this mind.
l knew you love this kid, l am going to kill him.
- Don't you afraid of Wan Fu Chia Chung. - Right.
You knew it already?
- Not yet. - You are so dumb.
Why hit me, l didn't learn it.
Why should l had to cheat him that l knew it.
Are you tearing off the building.
Don't worry, we will change another area to eat.
Tell you don't buy this house, but you refuse my suggestion.
That's it, don't fight.
The one who build this building is so terrible.
Cheating in the building materials, he won't die so comfortable.
- Wife, don't say like this. - What shall l say then?
Actually this house had a pretty good design.
Look, the wall is very concrete.
How come there is a leg here.
- What? - l am fine.
Tien Chian, you are too much.
Don't worry, not the girl's business, let man handle it.
Go away.
l can't help you, he use this act.
Go away, l am really angry.
Tien Chian is angry, very powerful.
Luckily there are some fire left.
Let me help you.
Don't get mad, get dress first.
- You take a rest first - l know.
You are so mean, press on their laugh point
within one hour they will laugh to death.
For those against me hardly can survive.
l mean they should be punished with fairness.
Nonsense.
Princess Yun Lo, l am really love you.
Even you ask me to wait for another seven hundred years, l'll.
l don't want you.
Ah Chi, get some equipment's to help.
Ah Chi.
All the Way Buhdda.
l don't start rolling, you are fighting a mess.
Lung Chin Fi
Master Lung, Ah Chi is right there.
l am not Master Lung, l am Master Ko.
So heavy, the brushes will do.
Don't try to use your teacher's name to trick me.
l know you are Lung Chin Fi.
l've told you l am not Lung.
Why are you two can't stop laughing?
Go get some thing and help me beat up this taxi driver.
Even Master Lung needs a weapon.
Who is the enemy, so powerful.
They have so many people, l am only one person.
He is finished.
He said he is the King of Martial Arts Tien Chian Foot.
What are you talking about?
Listen to me, he is out from the Psychiatry Center.
He treated you as Lung Chin Fi.
He is really crazy.
He is very crazy, try to hurt others.
You should stand behind me all the time.
Fine, you got taste.
Actually l was out of the society for so many years.
Since you recognized me.
Plus l had a quarrel with the taxi driver downstairs.
But l don't want to expose our identity.
So l need your help to ask them away.
Since Master Lung ask, l'll try my best to help.
My Tien Chian Kung Fu is almost done.
Master Lung, don't worry, l am not afraid of anyone.
Who is the guy, dare to offense Master Lung?
Old man, where did you find this monster to scare me?
Let's go.
Knock down the monster.
Tien Chian Foot.
- So powerful... - Not yet finished.
All the Buhdda...
Master Lung, very powerful.
Of course, you can use the Tien Chian Foot.
l only said those three words, they were all scare away.
Me and Ah Chi will fight against Tien Chian, you can protect Princess.
My daughter-in-law is very strong.
Tien Chian, we can't show in front of these people.
Our powerful martial arts.
Good, where do you think is appropriate?
Let's talk upstairs.
Sure
Master Lung, l'll get back my Princess Yun Lo.
Tien Chian, you are out of date.
Do you know l didn't go to that many places in Hong Kong?
- And prefer staying in Hong Kong. - Why?
Because this place had so many pretty girls.
Like Yun Lo's face are so many.
lf you don't believe, look around.
You two get all the pretty girls for me.
For this decade, we don't need guns for the girls.
They will come if you have money.
You better spend more time on earning the money.
Good idea.
He is agree with me.
Tomorrow you two follows me, go to rob some gold from the shop.
No, no way.
l'll kill you if you don't go.
- l won't set you free. - You are right...
Right, l had one thing want to let you eat.
Eat it.
What is this?
- You are the insect specialized. - Nonsense.
- Swallow it. - What is it?
This is Tien Chian insect, if you want to run away.
As long as l knock this drum...
No, no, don't knock.
Your stomach will break right the way.
You are so tough.
What's wrong, l forget to bring along other insects.
Great, god finally look at us.
You are in good luck, l had a huge one.
Father, help.
Nowadays, the young people are too much.
Afraid of death, and call me father.
Eat it.
Master Lung, are we going to the Bank tomorrow together?
No, from tomorrow on, l'll stay inside the room for ten years.
To practice the Ru Lai Shen Chiuan Number Ten.
During this ten years, you can take over my place.
Master Lung, do you really mean it?
Of course, l said what l mean, see you later.
l don't want to be the master.
l can't walk anymore.
Do you have to tight this one up?
Of course, we are in rubbery now.
We can't let other recognize us.
Do we arrived yet?
That's it, this is the biggest one.
Right, this is the one.
Good, you two go to rob thirty thousand ounce gold back here.
l'll kill you if you don't go.
- What shall we do? - Let's fool him.
Actually we don't have to rob them, we have the insiders there.
Yes, yes
This is the insiders' card, come.
Excuse me, excuse me.
Look
The Kung Fu is from Shao Lin, Shao Lin's Kung Fu is the most powerful.
Was hit so terrible, turn around and finished, give me the money.
Here is the money.
Kid, you are good.
Thanks
You two let me try it.
Shao Lin's Kung Fu is the best.
Hits so terrible, turn around and finished.
Give me...
Won't you give me the money?
Good, l'll catch you, see who are you.
Where is he? He can runaway so fast, good Kung Fu.
Quick, money is dropping, pick it.
Hi is carrying that machine, can't run so fast.
What's wrong?
lt must be that huge insect troubling me.
What shall we do?
Go back for him, or we are dead.
Sir, shall we call the ambulance for you?
No, you don't have, we can go by ourselves, thank you.
You are back, why do you try to escape?
What you had done is illegal.
illegal, l don't care, l am the most powerful person, l am the best.
Hong Kong Governor is the most powerful person.
What is Hong Kong Governor?
He is like the Governor of the Province.
Good, you two bring me to see him.
Let me kill him, and l'll be the Governor.
- What shall we do? - Let's see when we are there.
Go, quick
Wife, how's my performance on the stage that day?
You had a very good voice, l love it.
Go
- Who is he? - He is the Governor?
- l am the Governor. - Yes.
Look at his office dress.
Looks like the officer in the Emperor.
My goodness.
Mia Clan, The Seven Clan Blue Face Evil Lady.
Yes, watch out her Wave Kung Fu.
Brother, please be careful, take me to the car.
No matter what happen, please don't kill me.
lf you join in my Clan, l am your leader.
lf you against me, l'll have you be the thief forever.
He said if you against him.
Your son will be a mob, your daughter will be a hooker.
Good for you, both jobs can earn money for you.
Carol B, Wave create a new idea.
Can't conquer that feeling.
Fantastic...
He thinks he is the real Governor now, what shall we do?
Call the police, fantastic...
Me?
- What are you doing? - Make a call.
What call?
Talk with Master Talk with Master Lung.
Talk, Master Lung is inside his own room without seeing anyone.
l try to talk with him in case he gets bore.
Master Lung, we will wait for you at the Mountain Road, Number 18.
Did you hear, we will wait for you.
l don't want to get involve, you figure out yourself.
lf you miss Tien Chian, l'll bring him along.
Please don't bring him along.
Don't come.
Otherwise l won't give you money when you hand to me.
l won't talk with you.
Remember, don't block your future.
The most is l call the police for you.
Then l wait for you, bye.
- Master Lung is coming. - Good.
- Let's happy together. - Ha Pi?
Call the station, we have arrived the Mountain Road, Number 18.
The people inside listen, you had been surrounded.
You don't have a chance to escape.
Drop down your weapon.
Release the ransom and hands up.
Great, great, we are here.
There is an insect inside our stomach.
You don't want to go, don't bring us along.
Don't knock the drum, we won't go.
This is the last warning.
lf you don't come out within five seconds.
We will use the force.
5,4,3,2,1
Dragon A called Dragon B, please answer.
Carol B, Wave create the new idea.
Now continue the coverage.
According to the investigation, at least forty terrorists inside.
They all carried the most advance weapons.
The police is planning to ask the army for support.
Miss, what are you doing, you can't go in, it's dangerous.
My boy friend is inside.
lnside there is very dangerous.
Tien Chian is very dangerous, you can fight against him, get away from me.
- What is happening? - We don't have any bad influence.
the guy inside is very powerful.
He had a Tien Chian Cover, bullet proof.
Miss, l think you had watched too many Kung Fu films.
She means it.
Both of them came to help.
Who are you?
We came from the new China News.
Mr. Yin Chin, he is the special power technique's leader.
He is wondering the guy inside is one of his members.
His member?
Might be, we had so many people being forced to stay inside.
At least forty to fifty persons inside.
Well trained people stay in there.
office, tear gas is ready.
- Shoot. - Yes.
lt is dangerous, you can't do that.
Terrorists don't have hat huge power.
To throw back the tear gas out.
lt's all you fault, my husband is inside there.
l'll have you take the quilt if anything happened to him.
Sorry, ladies, how do you know that?
The real person inside that room?
None of your business, let's rescue them first.
l had a magic light flying power to get in.
Tien Chian can't notice me
let me go in first, then l'll figure out a way to get in.
My goodness, magic flying.
Those Flying Tiger members all swallowed the Tien Chian.
lf he knocks the drum, we all had to fell down.
He is watching television now.
Right, he is a television maniac.
He had watched over so many hours, l he will pass out.
Who is this girl, looks so ugly.
He saw me, l had to leave.
Want to leave.
Go, go
He is watching the television all the time.
Anyone appeared on the television, he will watch
and won't leave out the sight.
- Chou Yuen Fat. -Liu Shiou Ching, Li Chi
No, it must be Chow Yuen Fat.
lt's me, if l appeared on the television, he will watch.
Tien Chian, listen to me.
Now look at my watch, l'll count 1,2,3,
You will feel very sleepy, and go to sleep.
Don't watch that long.
Get up, go away now
- No - Why?
We still have the Tien Chian inside the stomach.
Don't be afraid, go, quick...
Someone is escaping.
They all try to escape.
Cheap lady, dare try to psy me out.
Don't be scare, you won't get hurt anymore.
His drum is in my hand, l break it already.
Go, quick, go
Don't close the door, l am here.
- You dare against me. - l don't
Don't run away.
Tien Chian Foot.
Open fire.
Master Yuen, please figure some way to help him.
He was hurt so badly.
The normal medical way can't save him.
The only way is we used our special power inside our body.
There is a method call transfer.
We can transfer his power to four of us.
As our power, everyone share fourth of it.
We can handle it.
But during that period, we should back up together.
No clothes between us.
Teacher Yuen, l am the worst, of course l'll be at the last spot.
lf you can against him, then you don't need me.
Teacher, please teach me all the technique.
Have all your money put into my pocket.
Me too, but l haven't study it yet.
Chinese Kung Fu needs practice daily.
Strengthen your breathing, to receive the food energy.
Up the ten or even hundred times.
lf you can get out all of your energy, then you will be stronger.
But, it only limited to your own power.
But my power is different.
What is the difference?
Human being is full of power.
According to Einstein's theory.
People die, he will leave some energy.
That's the place of grave where all the energy concentrate at.
How about the dead pigs?
You ate it all already.
Otherwise where is your energy to spread out your sweat.
You ate the pork daily, l think you are dumber than the pig.
- You always stare at me. - Of course
Our special technique doesn't need any food digestion.
Through a special method by using the brain to transfer the power.
Use the outside power to strengthen our power.
Can we absorb all types of energy?
Not really, some of it we can't absorb it.
Usually they will called them the ghost.
Don't bull shit.
l will call one to show you
You don't believe, wait and see.
Don't be too much as a ghost.
l'll cut your body into several pieces too.
That's it.
See what else can you play.
Don't bite, don't.
What? Are you alright?
Ah Fi, you are the only person to fight against Tien Chian
used the Ru Lai Shen Chiuan number nine.
But at that time.
The Fire God transfer sixty years power to Lung Chin Fi.
Plus he ate the 100 years old turtle.
Adds another hundred years, with the total of 160 years
You have only ate half of the Da Dan pill.
You have got twenty years power only.
Deduct others, may be only more than ten years power only.
lt is luck that you can learn the first eight acts.
The only method is absorb the outside energy.
What is the secret to absorb those energy?
l'll teach you a magic line.
Plus the Ru Lai Shen Chiuan you had, l think that's enough.
l want to learn it too.
You can't, your body is not good enough.
You ate too much pork, be aware the pig ghost will chase you.
Right, teacher Yuen, what you mean is.
After learning the magic line.
Then l can get out the most power of this Kung Fu.
Theoretical, there is no problem.
But facing to the reality, then...
What?
lt need the god's blessing.
What l had done for the whole night, l still needs the luck.
You shut up.
Master wants to eat hamburger.
Needs that much hamburger in order to beat out Tien Chian.
Tien Chian, l had eaten many hamburgers already.
- Tonight, at two midnight. - Midnight at two.
- At the top of the mountain. - Top of the mountain.
The satellite station...
Let's fight until death...
Times up, Tien Chian must come here soon.
You all be careful.
- Hsiu Mun - What?
l had a line want to tell you for a while.
l never had a chance to tell you.
What do you want to say, just say it, no one will laugh at you.
l am afraid l don't have chance after tonight.
Then say it.
- l want to sneak out. - No way.
Ah Fi, do you remember teacher Yuen's magic lice.
l just absorb some of the energy.
l feel more energetic now.
l want to absorb some too.
Watch out the ghost will come on your body.
Tien Chian is coming.
Remember no matter what happen don't come out.
After l beat Tien Chian, l'll marry you.
You don't care l am older than you.
Older than me, how old are you?
Seven hundred and sixty eight years old.
Well let's talk it after l finish the fight.
What is the big deal, just a fight.
The Buddha's power is all over.
What is it?
all the Buhdda...
l thought what you had learned.
Won't you ashamed of yourself.
What is this ?
Are you alright? Don't against your well.
Let me kill you.
Jump
All the Buddha's power get together.
Get out of the Tien Chian power.
Tien Chian Foot, the ninth style.
Come, please help him into the car.
Officer, l want speak with my friends.
- Sure, but keep it short. - Thank you
Thanks.
Brother Tien Chian, we are here to say goodbye.
This is the Carol B, and the hamburger for you to eat.
- Take care yourself. - You treat me so good.
l'll won't forget you.
But if l had the chance, l'll come back to see you.
Don't come back to me.